For those of you so inclined, here’s a Christmas greeting that will offend no one whatsoever. Well, let me re-phrase that…it might very well offend Christians but no one else.
A Politically Correct Holiday Greeting
Best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low-stress, non-addictive, gender-neutral, winter solstice holiday, practiced within the joyous traditions of the religious persuasion of your particular choice, but with respect for the religious persuasion of others who choose to practice their own religion, as well as those who choose to not practice any religion at all. Additionally, a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated recognition of the generally accepted calendar of 2009, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures, whose contributions have helped make our society great, without regard to race, creed, color, religion or sexual orientation.
(Disclaimer: This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for him/herself or others, and no responsibility for any unintended emotional stress these greetings may bring to those not caught up in the holiday spirit.)
The American Legion Magazine, December 2008
